Writing Is My Passion. 1 of them.

I had a blog on vox.com for a while in '08 & '09. I didn't update it very often & most of what I had on there was stuff I had written in the past; before I got the Vox account. I'm going to share my posts here instead so, here goes (I will be posting them in the same order I did there) :

Paying It Forward

Alright so here it is...I joined Vox a few days ago and until now, I had no idea what to write about. Even though I've always liked the idea, I've never been much of a "blogger" if you will. So, I tried to do a couple of the "Question of the Day" prompts and none of them really appealed to me. And that's when I decided just to wait for inspiration...for something that touched my heart or made the wheels in my mind un-rust themselves and start turning again. I finally found something that did both!

I was watching a movie called "Pay it Forward" which is really great. In this movie, a concept which is very obviously called "paying it forward" is brought to the world's attention. The way that it works is...you start with three people. It can be someone close to you or somebody who's a complete stranger, it really doesn't matter. What matters is that you figure out something that they need...something they can't do for themselves...something big...and you help them with that thing. But with each person you help, you tell them that they need to help three people and, when they do, to tell each of those people to help three other people and so on and so forth.

You can imagine how quickly that would spread with everybody participating correctly. If you've ever seen one of those STD charts that shows the transmission of the disease from one person to the next and how quickly it spreads, this is kind of similar...only, it will help the world, not hinder it. I found a chart that shows the process. The one on the left shows what I mentioned above and the one on the right shows 363 people that are helped by the end.

I'm almost certain you've heard of "Random Acts of Kindness" and if you've ever experienced either doing the RAKs or someone doing one for you, then you know how great it feels. The simplest, most random thing you do can make such a difference. So, imagine doing something big...that's more planned out and that will be dispersed to more people. I don't know about you, but I definitely think it's a great idea.

So, if you're reading this right now, I challenge you to participate in this movement. Make a difference in this world! Make the effort and start paying it forward!

Oh, and while you're at it, you should definitely watch the movie if you're into that sort of thing. 

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Free Rice!!!

If you’re gonna play a video game or a computer game, why not play one that actually has a purpose?  So many people I know spend hours upon hours playing games like World Of Warcraft that I honestly think are nonsense…no offence to those people by the way. I just think that they could be spending time doing something productive…ya know?

So there’s this game online that my sister found and showed to me. It’s kind of like a matching game with multiple answers for you to decide which is right for the question. You can choose from 12 different categories like art, or there are a couple of different languages (if you happen to know even a little bit of one, you will probably be able to get most of the questions right). With every question you answer correctly, they’ll be able to get 20 grains of rice to donate to people who need it. There is a statistic on the site that says that about 25,000 people die from starvation and that most of them are just children. Obviously, there are plenty of people you could help, just by playing a game…even a little bit helps. And the more people who know about it, the better.

It can actually be fun, especially when you’re playing with someone else. And, I’ve learned some things from playing too. Basically it’s something that’s beneficial to you and others. Don’t be a bum…at least check it out!
Read more information and play the game at:
Freerice.comThanks (:

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Rediscovering Passion

I haven't been on here since...way too long in my opinion. I need to start posting more. It helps.

Lately I've been so busy trying to figure out what I'm going to do in the next couple of years. I haven't even had the time to put forth much effort toward my friendships and other relationships. I hate it when that happens.

But at least I’ve had more time to myself I guess. I used to read a lot and I stopped for some weird reason…I don’t really know why. But I’ve been able to do it more and it’s really great. It’s relaxing again, which wasn’t the case even two months ago. I’ve also been able to practice things that I’ve been wanting to and getting back into the things I‘ve lost passion for. It’s been nice.

I think it's VERY important for everyone to take a little "me time" for themselves. 

You should do it!

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Oh My Insomnia!

Un Deux Trois,

I hate living in clutter. I mean, I wouldn't really consider myself a "neat-freak"...especially compared to my old OCD self...and from time to time, I get a bit lazy myself. But when it's everywhere I go and no matter how much I try to get rid of it, it never goes away, that's a little ridiculous. That's how it always is here at home. My dad has the worst organizational skills I've ever seen... because he's got so much on his mind all the time. And my sister needs clutter to function. She seriously can't find something she's looking for if her stuff is in order. I personally don't understand it. And it's particularly frustrating when I try to get it all straightened up while I'm experiencing a little bit of sleep deprivation.

I've noticed that nothing is quite right when I have gone without sleep for a long period of time. My thoughts are confusing. My actions are just a little bit off in a way. It's like my whole life is tweaked. I can't relate to people. My emotions are out of control. It all seems over the top. I don't really know how to describe it correctly enough to do it justice.

Watching "The Science of Sleep" last night wasn't helping either. For anyone who has ever seen it, you know what I'm talking about. And for those who haven't, you should. Now, imagine watching that movie in an insomniatic mode. It's a trip, let me tell ya! It would be pretty sweet to invert dreams and reality. It would be confusing though too. I don't know...I guess...it would just be great to see all of my strange thoughts and abstract dreams turned into something real...and to be able to create some things from the ideas I have. I don't even really know if that's what really happened in it since that was my first time seeing it, "I don't want to be spaghetti, I don't want to be spaghetti." Haha. I like that movie. It's weird. I like weird. Anyway..."distraction is an obstruction for the construction." 'Tis true you know...think about it.

Au Revoir!  

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Introduction:

The next 6 entries are an array of pieces I wrote during my Junior year English class in high school.

Enjoy!

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New Journalism-ish...

This is a short story I wrote when we were learning about "In Cold Blood" by Truman Capote and how to write "new journalism." The assignment was to write a fictional short story based on facts from a news article.

I chose an article by Matt Sedensky which you can find here. 

(I did have a link to the article but it doesn't exist anymore)

And this is what came from it:

Written January 31, 2008.

      Twelve year old 'John Doe' was never a particularly violent kid. However, his basketball coach had been noticing extremely competitive tendencies in the recent practices. This concerned him and he decided to take him aside after practice.

"Are you okay John?"
"Yeah, sure. Why?"
"I've just been noticing how competitive you've become in the past few months. Is everything okay at home?"
"Yeah everything's fine. I'm just...you know...being a kid."
"You're sure?"
"Yeah."
"Alright then. If I can help in any way, don't hesitate to ask."
"Alright. Bye Coach."
"See you tomorrow. You ready for the big game?"
"Yep. Later."

      As the coach suspected, John was lying. Everything wasn't alright at home. Over the past five months, ever since his cousin Shaloh's first birthday, John's parents had become extremely distracted by the baby. John felt as if the world was revolving around baby Shaloh and nobody noticed him anymore. Even when he scored the winning basket at the last game, his family didn't seem to take much interest in him.

      At first, John was heart-broken. After a while he began to get mad, and that soon turned to anger. He was angry at his parents and his aunt and uncle. But more than anything, he was angry at Shaloh. In fact, he hated him. As the only child, he was used to being the center of attention. How could he deal with that change?

      When his parents took him over to his cousin's house to babysit, he was infuriated. His parents had forgotten about his best friend's birthday party. Everyone would be there, including the girl he liked. It would be his big chance to get her attention. He'd been telling them how important it was for the last month. He reminded them that morning but their plans couldn't be interfered with. He had to do it, and that was that.

      Arriving at the house, his anger slowly turned to rage. He was so relieved to find the baby sound asleep but was still pissed about having to stay there. When all of the adults left, John put on the TV and grabbed a bag of chips from the kitchen pantry. Finally he was able to watch cartoons in peace.

      That soon changed as Shaloh began to stir under his blanket. Shortly after, came a cry. It started off quite and gradually got louder and louder. "Shut up," John finally screamed, holding his hands firmly over his ears. He looked around the room, anxiously trying to figure out what to do. Eventually, he saw a small wooden bat on the floor. Without thinking, he picked up the bat and slowly walked toward the helpless infant. "I hate you," said John, in a low, disturbing whisper.

"I hate you...I hate you...I hate you."

My teacher liked it and said she could see it being published with more development. Maybe I'll do it.

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The Legend of my Creation

We had to make a Native American legend that had typical aspects of actual NA creation legends.

I wrote this on February 6th, 2008.

      Loving Woman and Hunting Man are my parents. They first met when a mutual friend, Flowing River brought them together. They were soon inseparable. Their love for each other steadily grew until one day they decided to have a child...me.

      They ran deep in the forest to a secret spot they had together. In the soil, they carefully dug a hole, placed their seeds inside and covered it with more soil. Over the next nine months, they made sure to give that spot plenty of water and sunlight, along with little drops of love from their hearts.

      When it was the right time, and a sprout came up through the soil, my parents uncovered me. With the first touch of their hands, they gave me life. As I saw their faces, I began to smile and then, gradually, it turned to a laugh, which is how I got my name, Giggling Flower.

      This is how I was created, and now I'm ready to create my own child with my husband, Loving Bear.

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Narrative.Slavery

It is so heartbreaking what happened to those men, women and children who suffered through slavery & all that went with it. We learned about it in my class and wrote narratives.

Written February 11th, 2008.

     The ship was finally gone and I was so afraid of my new surroundings. The sky was dark but I could see light in the distance. The men guarding us carried the light around with them like little pieces of fire, in what I later found out were lanterns. They also carried with them, those long metal weapons I had never seen before they captured us. Even though I was so exhausted from the trip over the sea, I could not sleep here. I didn't know what these white men would do to me, or someone around me. I had come to love each one of the other captives because we had all gone through the same thing together. Even though we all were from different villages and spoke differently, I knew they must have felt the same as me.

     The next day was even more frightening than the last. The white men chained us together and brought us out in front of a crowd of white faces in big hats and peculiar clothes. These people inspected us individually, I guess to see who would be the best workers. Some looked at us with intrigue but mostly, they looked on with expressions of disgust. The men were the first to go, even though they looked about as weak as the women from the lack of food and the abuse they received on the ship.

     It took a few days for someone to choose me. I was so afraid when they put me in the back of the wagon. They kept my hands tied and covered my head. So when we finally stopped, I had no idea where we were. They took me out and the woman brought me into a large barn while the man walked out toward the fields. The woman tied my roped hands to the wall and walked out, locking the door behind her, not even saying a word to me or looking me in the eye. 

     When she came out, she brought a young white man with her and said, "this is my son." Even though I didn't understand her at the time, I knew it was her son because they looked alike. He had her blue eyes. They were cold and piercing like ice. He seemed about my age and had a stern look on his face. Finally, when the woman left, he got a hose and spraid me down. The water was freezing, colder than I had ever felt before. When he was done, he threw some clothes at me and left me alone. I felt so afraid and alone, and hurt. I didn't even think about what would come the next day except to hope that others were here with me.

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My Home

We studied Mark Twain and wrote paragraphs that had to imitate some of his work.

This was during a very nostalgic period in my life so I chose to write about what I think of when I remember the place that I consider my home. I appreciate it now more than ever. Everytime I get the chance to go there again, it's even more beautiful than the last time. : )

May 2nd, 2008

      Sometimes we'd have the whole city to ourselves. We could see a billion stars from anywhere we were, shining like the nonexistent city lights. It was beautiful. Looking out from the mansion or the golf course or the helicopter pad, we were the only people in the world! Those nights were my life. They consumed me in my happiness. Even today, in my memories, I am still standing on the building drinking a Jones soda.

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My Taste of Transcendentalism

One of the sections we learned about was Transendentalism. We learned about a lot of -isms actually. This is my poem about nature...written April 11th, 2008.

As I look up at the sky

I see that it is much like me
The clouds are ever changing
Ideas flowing through my head
This likeness is a comfort
As well as the soothing light
When the sun comes out to say hello
My attention's drawn to the tall, tall trees
These trees that make me feel so small
Make my problems miniscule
Life is beautiful on these branches
Like the birds singing their sweet songs
Singing songs for the squirrels to dance to
As they jump from branch to branch
Until one sees me and they stop
Staring at me, seeing the true me
Making me feel clear and lucid
Like the water in the pond
Then I look and see the fountain
Bringing energy to the moment
And that's what water does, I guess
Brings life to everything around it
Like the grass I see that's home to many
And to me as I observe
Observing nature and in a way
Observing myself as well

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Poems from Beyond the Barrier

These three poems were written April 9th 2008 during our poetry section. They were kinda healing for me :)

1
So Much Noise, So Little Room

Can't take it anymore
Need to get away
There's not enough room
For me in this place

I can't be alone
Can't hear myself think
I need my own space
That's not next to the sink

'Cause even here
It's still too much
I can't bare this much longer
This is way too tough

It's not fair
I need room to breathe
To concentrate and study
Or how will I succeed?

Help me get outta here
I need somewhere to go
To get away from the noise
Somewhere to be alone

I'm going crazy
I can't do this
I'm gonna fail school
If I don't get some silence

2
Not Supergirl, Just Me

I'm doing the best I can
I try everyday
But I can't keep your house perfect
And make good grades too
I'm not your son
I actually try
And yet it isn't good enough
You expect me to do more
Well don't you know...
There's only so much I can take
It's killing me inside
This feeling of inadequacy
Please leave me alone
Just let me be
I try and I try
But can't seem to please you
I'm so sorry
That I'm not perfect
Like your children are
Even though they're not
At least I don't lie
And I try...all the time
But I still can't do enough
And it's causing me to break
So please, I repeat
Just leave me alone
I need this right now
Or I won't be okay
Please don't let
                         my happiness disappear

3
Numbing Liquid

It's what gets her through the day
Through the week
Through the year
Why are we not enough?
She loves the bottle more than us
The one that's full of...something
Some kind of poison
Enchanting her to sleep
Disappearing with each sip
She does it everyday
She starts---so early
We don't even notice until it's too late
We've become numb haven't we?
And that's what it does
It numbs her...
And thus, we are numb too 

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Classical Music & Genius Authors

I've recently started listening to classical music and I've fallen completely in love with it. The music is so beautiful whether it's slow and calm or fast and full of energy...it is ALWAYS beautiful. I have yet to find one song that doesn't make me feel good inside. The music isn't polluted with harsh or negative words, or phrases that don't make any sense. Of course, I love other types of music and I'm a singer so I do like lyrical songs too. But there's just something about classical music that I truly feel...connected with? I don't know if that's right but it's just so unfathomably great. It's almost like it speaks to my soul in a way...I think I can actually feel my soul for the first time...at the risk of sounding kind of weird or corny. This feeling is new to me so I don't really know how else to describe it. All I know is that I love it...the feeling I get, the sound of the instruments or single instrument, everything. It's perfect.

On another note:  I'm reading Twilight. I didn't think I would read it when I first heard about it and I didn't really understand what all the hype was about. I've always been fascinated by the idea of vampires but...I don't know. I just thought it wouldn't be worth it. I don't usually like the same things as the majority. Both my sister and I felt like it was probably over-rated. But our sister in-law talked us into it and I am now on the second book. I've actually come to like it very much. I relate to the main character Bella more than any character of any book or movie that I know of. It was kind of weird at first, but I got used to it. Anyway, it is worth it. The movie on the other hand, was reletively disappointing. My expectations were too high. Of course, compared to the book, a movie is rarely just as good. So, if you're one of the rare people who haven't had anything to do with the Twilight saga yet, I would suggest seeing the movie first if you're not worried about spoiling the ending of the book like I was. Then again, the endings are quite different so...you decide. I'm very excited for New Moon. I hope it's better than the first. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that the wonderful Stephenie Meyer will finish Midnight Sun.

I'm also reading Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas:  A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream by Hunter S. Thompson. What a mouthful huh?! I've been meaning to do this for quite a while now...ever since I saw the movie. I think Johnny Depp was the perfect actor to cast as the writer. The content is very weird...which I love. It's so interesting and I believe Hunter S. Thompson to be a genius when it comes to writing...and perhaps even life. I'm planning on reading his other novels as well

I have an abundance of other books I want to read but if you have any suggestions, no matter the genre, I'd be very interested and thankful if you'd let me know...even if you're reading this entry a year from now.

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We the People!

[I wrote this at the end of last year ('08) and just came across it again so I decided to share :) ]

   I was watching a stand-up comedian a couple of months ago. He was probably in his 50s and talking about global warming and “going green.” Sure, it was meant to be funny but…what he said was not funny. Usually I’m not that picky. I don’t get offended easily and I can find humor in almost anything…but I just couldn't laugh while listening to that. I don’t remember exactly what he said anymore but I do remember that it actually pissed me off! This issue is a little more serious than he put it. And I think it’s great to lighten up a situation but that’s definitely not the way to do it. Give your audience hope. Have a little more hope for your country! Sure, it’s become full of corruption, and you may have to wade through all the bullshit but you know what…a little goes a long way and an example set by an “average Joe” will be stronger than that of a leader who has forgotten what it means to be a true American…who has forgotten what our forefathers set forth for us to live by in the Constitution.

   Those people…our so-called “leaders”…the people who have so-called “power”…those aren’t the real leaders. The only reason they have that power is because we let them have it. Now, I don’t want to start anarchy or anything…it’s just…it’s that attitude…that “we won’t have solar power in my lifetime” attitude that got us where we are now. How about some optimism people! We are the people that can make a difference in the world. The things our leaders do and the way they are, is the same as how we are when you really think about it. They’ve forgotten, but so have we. You know…if you want something to be different, don’t complain about it, do something about it! This guy infuriated me because of his shite attitude. We say we want change, we say we want the government to be better. Well, if we don’t start with ourselves, why should they listen to us? If we can change ourselves, we will set the example, we will reflect onto all others, and we will be successful in making the change that we want to see for our nation…for our world!

   There’s a quote by Charles R. Swindoll that says:

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our Attitudes.”

   I believe that everything in that quote is exactly true. There’s one thing missing though. It should say, “It will make or break a company... a church... a home…a country.” Right? Because that’s where we are now. Most of us have bad attitudes about the government, the country, maybe even life in general. But the only thing that will fix it, is changing that attitude so that we have the ability to embrace what we’ve been given and change what we don’t like. We can work as individuals and we can work together for the betterment of this country and even of this world. We are Americans, people! Think about what that really means. Think about what we have and what we have to give. This is “the land of the free and the home of the brave!” Be brave. Be the change. We the People!

(Aaaand that's a wrap.)